As we approach the Valentine's Day We need to practice some kindness towards ourselves and others.  It is a time to find gratitude and happiness in the moment.  What is happening in the  present moment matters most.   Do not try to focus on the future or past but be present whether you are alone or with your most significant other.  Enjoy the day whether you treat yourself or others  to a box of chocolates.  Make the day your own.

Make some time for a metta meditation and send some love out to everyone.

Starting a new year is always a time of excitement as we shake off the doldrums of the previous year.   This is a time of planning and looking forward to our next vacation, our next course and challenges.   We often set resolutions that we want to eat better, exercise or just be a better person and more mindful.

As the cold of January grips us slowly the resolutions loose some of their strength.  The will to resist those chocolate cookies is too strong and we crack.   We need to stop depriving ourselves of these snacks.  When we have something that is not healthy, take time to really enjoy it, bite by bite.  Eat slowly enjoy the taste and really savour it.  Don't gobble.. that defeats the purpose.  Evelyn Tribole has written many books on Intuitive Eating and this helps create a more positive relationship with food.

Take time this January to look after your mind and body.   Be kinder to yourself during these cold months as we navigate our goals.

Happy Christmas!   As we gather together as a family we are always reminded of those who are no longer with us at our table.  The holidays are especially challenging as this is when we are expected to be happy and jolly.   However, sometimes we are not feeling particularly joyful.  The days leading up to Christmas are always a struggle as they often are a trigger for our grief.

Recently, I heard something that really resonated with me.  Grief is like a stone in your pocket, it never goes away but gets lighter as time goes by.  From Never Stop Growing (instagram).  My grief is certainly not lighter.. I will say my stone is weighing very heavy in my pocket lately.  However, I powered through the day and made Christmas dinner.  Now, as things wind down I will light a candle in memory of the family members no longer with us and be grateful for the wonderful memories that I have.

As I continue my grief journey, I find this holiday weekend particularly challenging.  Even armed with the knowledge that the holidays are often a trigger does not provide an emotional immunity in order to deal with what is arising.

The tendency to fight which arises is natural.  Choosing distraction activities such as a run -particularly useful especially if you are not a runner.  Then, running makes you focus on the breath by necessity.   Also, being super busy Marie Kondo your cupboard/basement whatever... I did try this, and while it is satisfying cleaning up an area the messiness that is created in the interim is enough to drive one to utter madness.

Perhaps we should just be with what is arising.  But there has to be a way to do this in a kind way so you are not in a constant state of turmoil.   If you sit and meditate and just watch and label the emotions.   Sadness, sadness , sadness then just adopt a curiosity about what is happening.   You can also try to not dredge up your most painful grief memory.  This is a time to go easy on yourself and see literally what comes up and then, let it pass.

As we jump into the fall season, the garden starts to change.  Tomatoes that were green slowly are turning a golden yellow.  Strawberries, started from seed are bearing fruit!   Thank you, West Coast Seeds.  

The strawberries are truly delicious.  Unfortunately, the squirrels and rabbits have been eating most of the fruit.  Now the small bunnies have discovered a love of cherry tomatoes and romaine.  This is after battling slugs all summer who attacked the tomatoes with a gusto!

Yet, still I do not give up hope.  I keep checking the carrots to see how they and the beets are doing.   So far they are quite small.   

This time I am really trying to stop grasping.  After listening to many Joesph Goldstein podcasts on mindfulness I am taking the lessons to heart.   Taking time to actually just listen to the leaves rustling in the trees is very peaceful.  

As I look out the window and I watch the leaves on the chestnut tree turn from green to a golden orange, I am amazed at this season.  We have many reasons to feel truly blessed, even when so many things are challenging.